Nightmares,

Got back all my results, passed all. Im happy because my dreams came true . Went home after school and movied awhile . Slept and I just woke up from my sleep at 7 and im like zombie. Used the computer awhile before Dawn asked me out . Meeting Dawn now, bye, off to bathe. My mother is out and i know i cant tell her things or she will get worked up. I've waited for just 1 text for hours.. Sighz. Fuck my life. I just screwed it . Spammed my whole private blog. OMFG.

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Tears flow, I felt the gaps, I felt the differences, I felt my nightmare was like the reality. I fear of crying forever, fear "bad dreams come true". I couldnt control my heart, i couldnt talk to my heart and feel my heartbeat anymore. I really need someone to teach me how to stand up on my feet. Even how much my heart aches every time i look at your window, stop breathing every time i hear your name, crying myself out to sleep, missing you so much that i wish to sleep forever but I will lie to myself, and put on my face a happy smile because you don't see the pain i'm going through. Every night I will pray that for things to change and assure myself. I distinctly remember what happen in my dream. I can't escape the thought of you. Even in my dreams you are there. I really hope it was just my imaginations that ran wild, instinct that ran wrong and in reality, it will never come true.. My biggerst fear is that one day , we will pass each other on the streets and have an artifical conversation. Im not brave enough, i admit that. I dreamt some thing good and it came true , what if is a bad dream?